Our potty training experience

I feel like I had unrealistic expectations when it comes to potty training.  You always read these articles like, "How to potty train your child in 3 days!"  Ok, great- easy enough!  Except, I am not sure I know anyone who has actually had their child FULLY potty trained in 3 days flat (If you have- kudos to you.  Maybe you can give me some pointers for next time?).  Maybe that is where I misunderstood.  I thought surely that meant in 3 days there were no more diapers and no more accidents. 

What I have learned from this experience is that potty training is a marathon, not a sprint.  It is not something that happens over night.  It is more of a few months rather than a few days.  I decided to REALLY start potty training Brady right before Christmas when he was out on break from school (2 years 3 months).  I figured this would be a good time, because I would be home with him a lot.  I didn't go cold turkey and completely take his pants and let him run around the house naked like some articles suggested.  For one, this would not work with Brady.  He really likes to have his pants on.  Even when we take them off for him to change he starts whining, "I cold momma, I cold momma!"  So, that was out of the question.  Second, to be honest, I did not want my brand new carpet and brand new sofa to be peed on.  So we kind of alternated between under wear and pull ups.  We made a BIG deal about him being in "big boy underwear", and I think this really helped him to be excited about going to the potty.  He had actually been going on the potty for the past couple months.  He did not tell us when he had to go, but if we asked him to he would.  This is how I knew he was ready.  I didn't use any kind of reward system other than a lot of praise which seemed to really work for him.

By the time we sent him back to school, he was completely potty trained (or so I thought).  Another thing they don't tell you is that kids that age will not tell you they have to go.  You have to take them to the potty every 30 minutes or so, and you have to watch what they are drinking.  So, when he went back to school he started having accidents and then telling me, "change my diaper momma!"   This was very frustrating as he was doing so well and took so many steps backwards.  They moved some new children up to the 2 year old room after break and they were still in diapers. He saw them getting attention, and he wanted it too.  With this regression we started back with the pull ups for a while as the constant accidents were getting exhausting.  There were also times when he would see my changing Katelyn and PURPOSELY pee in his pants just so I would have to change him.  Again- it's a marathon not a sprint.

We just kept talking up the potty and making a really big deal after he would go.  One thing that took forever was doing #2 on the potty.  I don't know why, but this was terrifying to Brady.  When we would put him on the toilet and tell him to go he would cry and scream.  He just didn't want to do it.  Finally after sitting there with him for however long Paul finally got him to do "a big one".  We called and told everyone we knew that Brady did "a big one".  After he conquered his fear he was fine and usually wanted to call everyone and tell them about it.

Finally after a couple months I felt like we could say he was totally potty trained.  Of course there were still occasionally accidents (more so at school than at home), but he was doing great.  He was even to the point of telling us when he had to go. 

Now he can pretty much go completely by himself.  I keep a step stool by his toilet and he can pull his pants down himself.  "Give me pivacy momma- I do it myself." These little mile stones make parenthood just a little bit easier.  He hardly ever has an accident anymore, and if he does it is usually for attention (for example when you put him down for nap and he just wants you to have to come change him).  He still wears diapers at night and pull ups at nap.  I did an experiment a few weeks ago to see if he was ready to nap in his underwear, because usually he does not go the whole time he is asleep, but just when he first wakes up.  However, he woke up and confusingly told me, "my pants all wet momma."  I realized we weren't quite ready for that yet.  But, that's ok!  As I have learned through my couple years of motherhood experience- this too shall pass.  For almost a week now he has woken up from nap and in the morning with a dry diaper telling us he has to go. So, I may try the underwear at nap again in the near future.  Soon enough diapers will be a distant memory.

All of this to say- don't have crazy expectations of potty training.  Everytime they go on the potty is a win.  They will get it.  Your child is not going to go to kindergarten in diapers.  It takes time, a lot of patience, and a lot of praise, but it will stick one day. They say girls are easier.  Here's to wishful thinking, right?